Freelance

My 2019 Winter Wonderland

I feel like I always start my blog posts this way, but a lot has happened since I last wrote. Since I’ve started this blog, I feel that I have overall become more mindful of my thoughts, I’ve been able to organize them better, using this as an outlet for my feelings to better myself on the outside. I want to continue doing this because I feel like it’s been extremely helpful for me to look back on and reflect to. Even if I don’t do it often, I like that it’s there for when I need it.

It’s inexpensive, and I take as much time as I need to take my thoughts out whenever I need it. Extremely flexible, and for that, I’m grateful for starting it in the first place.

I’ve helped and gotten close to a lot of my family members, one of them in particular *******, was also going through a lot this year, and I’m really glad that her and I can grow together. I want her to be a better person, because that’s what she wants from herself. And it’s been an ever growing process for me as well, so I try to help her as much as I’ve been able to help myself. Sometimes helping her in turns helps me simultaneously, we both take the time to reflect.

I’ve also made friends in University. In the 7 years that I’ve attended, I finally know the difference between the temps and the real ones. Conveniently, both of the friends I’ve made also live in Brampton so they’re never too far away. I still fear that with our busy schedules we may not see each other often, or at all. With that being said, I don’t dwell on it much, I’m happy and that’s all that matters.

The greatest thing to come of all for the New Year, is going to Montreal with my one and only. Our 3rd Christmas Break together and I’m still completely in love with him, I really can’t imagine being with anyone else. He introduced me to his parents April 2018, and the relationship I’ve been able to build with his entire family has been a blessing. I’ve never felt so welcomed and warm in another home. It feels like my second home, and I’m just so happy they’re comfortable with me. It makes me really optimistic for the future. They always want to help whenever they can, and I always appreciate the support and love they provide me, I hope to never take it for granted. And thinking about the way I feel about his parents, make me want to appreciate the parents I have in my own home as well, yes they have their flaws, but I know they love me, and I love them so I am trying not to take them for granted either.

Going back to *****, everything about our weekend together was perfect in its own way. A lot of things went wrong (because it was New Years Eve/Day a lot of things were closed and unavailable to do, I forgot my anklet at an ONRoute pitstop, etc.), but it didn’t matter because no matter what he always made me feel good. He was so thoughtful, and caring and considerate. An absolute gentleman and I’m so grateful to have him in my life. He went on a trip to Jamaica for a week, and that was his first big vacation and I was so excited for him, but we missed each other A LOT. It meant a lot to both of us I think to spend this weekend together. I’m just so happy with how it all turned out, no matter what went wrong we just improvised and went with the flow, and that’s what I love about him most. Stress-free. I can’t wait to spend a week or something in the summer with him in Montreal again.

I originally wanted to make this post all about Montreal in detail, but to be honest, I think what I wrote is enough, and if I feel to recount the entire trip again in another post, I will, but overall it was just lots of sex, alcohol, weed, and cuddles. What more could I ask for? He makes me feel so special, and that’s something that’s been consistent throughout our relationship. I only hope to continue to be even better for him and for me.

I’m going to start working out with his sister, I’m graduating (along with my boyfriend and his brother) in April, I’m possibly going to start working full-time, there’s going to be a lot going on this year for me, and with that will probably come a lot of stress, which I’m trying to prepare for, but as of right now, I’m excited and hopeful.

Financially, there’s been a bit of a struggle, but for once, it’s me that people have been leaning on to for money. Hopefully they get their finances straightened out so that I can help myself too.

This year I plan to be more selfish than I have been in the past. I’m looking out for me first, and the rest will come afterwards. Whatever happens, happens. I’m not forcing anything anymore, or creating big expectations.

I didn’t need a “New Year” to chime in for me to do this, but it sure does make it a hell of a lot easier, when the New Year comes synonymous with a ‘reset button’ for some. And I’ll take it.

Cheers to new beginnings. And hopefully a really big chapter in my life!

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