I was thinking about writing a more positive post today. Of course after work once I had some free time to sit down and relax. Possibly write things I like about myself (gross 🤢), or possibly just being grateful for what I have instead of complaining about what I don’t.
I’ll definitely be doing that now after what just happened tonight. A friend and I had just got off work. As employees we’re told to park at a completely different parking lot across the street from our workplace to free spots up for customers. Some coworkers abide by the rules (me) some don’t (my friend). Every night they offers me a ride to my car. And every night I tell them it’s fine because it’s just across the street there’s no need to waste gas. And every night they convince me to get in their car and take me to mine. We usually use it as an opportunity to talk and catch up for a bit anyway. I’m a different person as a friend than I am as a coworker sometimes. So are they.
Anyway, they drive me to my car. We’re sitting in their car stalling, talking, laughing. We’re sitting there for about 10 minutes. I was starting to grab my bags to leave the car when all of a sudden this man comes running towards us. Jumped a fence to get to us and started walking purposefully towards the passenger window (where I was sitting mind you). I was terrified. I shouted “lock the doors!”. They locked immediately. The man started knocking the window. Initially seemed like a typical city beggar, but then he started trying to open the door handles for the back seat of the car.
We didn’t understand what the fuck was going on. Fucking terrified my friend started to drive away from the man. Luckily the doors were locked. It’s only 9pm. The sun still lit the sky up slightly. Wasn’t even dark. He knew we were in the car. He started trying to pry open other cars in the area. My car has been having trouble locking lately. I’ve made it a habit to manually lock my door before leaving my car just in case. And thank goodness I did. We got lucky that my friend moved quickly enough to lock their doors. Had it been a second slower that man would have got into the car. We didn’t know if he had a weapon. We didn’t know what he was capable of.
We were really freaked out. Freaked. The. Fuck. Out. We called the cops. We described the man and told the police what direction he was heading. My friend drove me back to my car, watched me get in and we both got the fuck out of there. My friend saw the cops rushing to the area we described as they were driving home. I was already halfway home by then.
It was really scary. And I’m glad I had a friend who took me to my car safely. I took it for granted. Not to say that something like this happens every night. There will be some nights I can walk to my car perfectly safely. And alone at that. But today was one of those days where I really was grateful for having someone take me to my car so that both of us were safe. Mind you if I hadn’t stayed and idled with my friend for 10 minutes we probably wouldn’t have even saw the man. Regardless. I’m thankful. And whenever I’m grateful, I make an honest effort to make it known that I am grateful.
To an outsider this may seem like a super dramatic story, and so what big deal someone tried to get into the car. But things like that are slim to none in the area I live in. For the most part. Maybe I’ve just been sheltered from it. I can understand my mom’s paranoia now. I think if anything it’s made me even jumpier.
I’m also reminded of this anecdote: my ex and I were just talking the other day of what I would do if someone broke into my house or if I was in a dangerous situation and I told him that in all honesty I think I’d be the character that dies first in those horror movies. That docile blond girl screaming her head off, defenseless and scared. He didn’t believe me. He thinks if the time came I’d try to survive. I didn’t think so. I honestly don’t know what I’d do but I can’t imagine myself thinking brilliantly to get out of that situation and survive. I’d ideally love to be that person, But I can’t confidently say I would be. It will have to be something I work towards for sure.
With that being said, I think I proved my point. I was defenseless. Sitting in the passenger seat I just sat there frozen incapable of thinking of what to do. I was not quick on the draw at all. It was my friend that locked the door and then drove away. They were also the ones to call the cops. I suggested it, but it wasn’t like I was calling while they drove away. I just didn’t know what to do I was trying to absorb everything happening. I did well describing the man and the events that unfolded when the time came. But had I been in a situation where it could’ve been more dangerous – such as the man getting in the car. I don’t know what I would have done. I know my friend carries a screwdriver in their car hidden in the driver’s side pocket. And they probably would’ve been quick on the draw. But me? I wouldn’t have survived. It’s really embarrassing and disappointing for me to come to this realization in its totality, but it’s unfortunately who I am in a panicked situation.
How I was a lifeguard 7 years ago is beyond me. (Not that anything lethal happened at that time anyway but still). I’m not a hero. I don’t have it in me to even defend myself. And I don’t know how I’m going to change that, but something’s going to have to be done if I want to survive.
Nonetheless I’m ever grateful to having a friend like that, and just overall grateful that the situation wasn’t worse. 🙏